All the sexy, fashiony connections we could draw from Beyoncé’s epic visual album drop

As the Internet, every friend or your internal Queen Bey clock have already alerted you to, Beyoncé released her fifth album exclusively on iTunes just before midnight last night. Quietly, elegantly and with the regal control we’ve come accustomed to with the superstar, she one-upped the leakers by being the first to release the self-titled album to the grovelling masses. “I didn’t want to release my music the way I’ve done it. I am bored with that,” she says via video press release. “There’s so much that gets between the music, the artist and the fans. I felt like I didn’t want anybody to give the message when my record is coming out. I just want this to come out when it’s ready and from me to my fans.”

Beyoncé is 14 tracks, 17 videos and features a never-ending contributor roster ranging from Frank Ocean and Drake to Terry Richardson and Jonas Åkerlund. Blue Ivy’s in there too, as is her pops Jay-Z. According to the press release, Beyoncé has been recording the songs and filming the videos for over a year while on her Mrs. Carter Show World Tour which is a feat cause a) how the eff does one even function on so high a frequency and b) how the eff did not one of the zillion contribs and/or innocent bystanders (like any of these people) say a thing? Likely to be revealed later: Scarlet letter Bs imprinted on the bodies of 100 music moguls.

As for the fashion, cause hey, there’s plenty to talk about there, French designer Maxime Simoens seems to already be lapping up Queen Bey wearing one of his silvery gowns in the Terry Richardson-shot video for “Mine” which co-stars Drake. She previously wore one of his designs on the inside sleeve of her last album, 4.

Also notable is the appearance of grill-ified Joan Smalls, Jourdan Dunn and Chanel Iman, who star in the incredibly sexy video for “Yonce.” 30 seconds does not do this supermodel throwback justice.

Speaking of sex, can we just for a second? (“Just what?” I don’t know) The only thing that would make the “Partition” video would be an appearance by Rihanna.

Speaking of sex part two: The video for “Rocket” is giving me major D’Angelo vibes.

Speaking of sex part three, the vintage edition: in the video for “Blow,” Beyoncé hints at oral sex alongside Pharell while strolling through a seventies roller rink with Farrah Fawcett-worthy blond curls, wet red lips and teal shadow.

And finally, because there is no way to throw from sex to a baby (except maybe in science), peep little Blue making her latest video appearance in “Blue,” as her mother cradles her while walking the Rio beach. There’s another song called “Jealous” and that would be a good place to end this.

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