Hollywood’s latest round of engagement rings: Love or hate?

by Sarah Casselman January 27, 2016

Disclaimer: Do not show your significant other this post as it may cause him/her to experience the shakes and the sweats, especially if you’re looking for him/her to put a ring on it this year.

Hollywood’s bling ring has just inducted a few new members into the multi-carat club. Besides sending our heartfelt congrats to the blushing brides-to-be—Mariah Carey, Tory Burch, Eva Longoria, Jerry Hall and Miley Cyrus (rumoured to be, in the case of Cyrus)—we would also like to say HOLY SHI…Shine! These engagement rings (are they rings or are they asteroids orbiting fingers?) are the epitome of extravagance—file under #Bless. Sure, they are disgustingly large, but that’s also why we love them. Like haute couture, they bring fantasy to life. Whether you love ’em or they make you want to lash out, these multimillion- dollar sparklers are great cocktail-party fodder. Talk about breaking the ice.

Mariah Carey’s planet-sized boulder (her 35-carats make Kim K’s 15-carats look like small fries) doesn’t come as much of a surprise, considering she’s hooked her butterfly wings into Aussie billionaire James Packer. Tory Burch’s blinding rock from Pierre-Yves Russel, CEO of LVMH Fashion Group (which owns luxury brands like Louis Vuitton and Givenchy), looked right at home styled with legit runners. Clearly Ath-luxe is the new Ath-leisure. Recently, media tycoon Rupert Murdoch put a ring on it, too. A marquise-cut diamond (both edges are pointed) could have gone horribly wrong (remember Carrie’s first ring from Aidan, the nightmare one Miranda helped pick out?), but it looks oh-so-right on Jerry Hall. Eva Longoria’s man, Jose Antonio Baston, bucked tradition with his big ol’ fiery ruby ring surrounded with clusters of diamonds. Then there’s Miley, who we can’t say for sure is actually officially engaged (rumour is girlfriend just started wearing her 3.5-carat Neil Lane sparkler again from ex-fiancé Liam Hemsworth now that they’re “on” again), but nonetheless her rock is big enough to talk about/obsess over/hate on/whatever.

What have we learned here today? Nothing that will change the course of our lives, but we’ve been dazzled and that counts for a hell of a lot. In today’s keep-your-nose-to-the-grindstone society, we all need a little sparkle. It doesn’t matter how you find your smile; the important thing is that you do. And for that, dear Mariah, we thank you for sharing your gargantuan puke-worthy ring.