SNP’s word of the day: Paternity

Word: Paternity

Meaning: The legal acknowledgment of the parental relationship between a man and a child.

Usage: “As her boyfriend Justin Bieber began fighting a paternity suit accusing him of fathering a fan’s child out of wedlock, Selena Gomez put aside any upset she could be feeling to attend the “Stars” gala at the Beverly Hilton on Tuesday night.” — the L.A. Times

You should know it because: Oh, baby, baby, baby. Like you can avoid it. Justin Bieber is being accused of siring the male offspring of Mariah Yeater, a 20-year-old California girl who met the Biebs at one of his concerts last year. It’s almost enough to make me God-fearing again, because immaculate conception? The only possibility. I refuse to accept that Bieber has man-parts.

The 17-year-old pop idol will have to undergo a paternity test, which puts him in some pretty stellar company: Mick Jagger, Steve Jobs, Elvis Presley, and DMX have all been forced to prove they are—to quote Maury Povich—not!!! the father. Of course, they all lost, in this game where the prize is “not being bound by blood and obligation to a community college cheerleader whose last name you never knew.”

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