What’s in your bag, Donald Robertson?

“The tote is an LL Bean bag that actually got a paint pallet stuck down on it, upside down on it by accident. It looks super pretentious like I did fake painting on it, but it’s the real deal man, it’s the real deal. It’s my signature and now it’s near and dear to my heart.”

“Always carry around an umbrella, because I’m carrying around art—shit can’t get wet. I always seem to have an umbrella.

I recently met the S’well bottle people—plastic water bottles bad!—so I’m trying to be a very good S’well person and fill up instead of dragging all that plastic around. So, they’re actually very, very cool and they sent me a big box of stuff so I’ve always got one with me, so that’s very good.

I’ve got my Canadian, pain in the ass, passport. Which I can’t seem to get rid of—just because I don’t want to. I literally had just gone through a Green Card renewal nightmare, because now you have to renew that stuff, even though I have been living and paying taxes there for about a million years but I’m still doing it because I still like writing Canadian on the customs form.

I have my UTA business card, which is a very big deal because I am now represented by UTA. I recommend you all Google who is represented by UTA because I do not want to be a name dropper. But Google that, you’re gonna die. It’s all part of my global takeover.”

“So I’ve got my Mitford book, I’ve got my catalog that I still can’t believe Holt Renfrew did, they put Colt Renfrew on the cover, it was like a crazy, we were joking around and now it’s in gold foil—extra fancy, and to show my appreciated to Holt Renfrew and my country, I signed each one of these puppies and it was a lot. Some kid in the PR department asked me if I would sign all of them and it was so bold a request, I was like, yeah, why not? So, yeah, so that was good.

The Tom glasses were a gift from my boss John Dempsey who is good friends with Tom and is always giving gifts.

I am constantly thinking of new ways to do weird things. I think Zoolander should be the face of money, for one whole year. Why can’t the Federal Reserve be as fun as Holt Renfrew. If Holt Renfrew can put Colt Renfrew on the front of their fancy fall catalog, the federal reserve can be a little bit fun for a movie premiere, which is really the only industry that is keeping the country alive—Hollywood, let’s play, so that’s what I’m doing.

Always have sharpies, always have sharpies, that’s just like my thing that I always, always have- always sketching, constantly.”

“My watch, which I always have, even though my phone is technically my watch, I still always have a watch, but not an Apple Watch. I forget to put it on, but I do like it.

My wife recently told me that I was looking a little haggard, I think it’s probably because I don’t sleep, so she said I have to moisturize. So I hooked up with my friends from Estée Lauder and they hooked me up with Tom Ford. I was like, that’s not a nice thing to say, but it’s true. Might as well use the Tom Ford, you know, why not? He looks good. I think he’s like a little bit younger than me. Ok, he’s way younger than me, but he looks good.”