FASHION Magazine

Blue Ivy Carter was destined for greatness when she was a mere twinkle in Jay-Z’s eye, but no one expected she’d become a fashion mogul less than a month after her birth.

The couple has filed an application to trademark their offspring’s name (the real name, though we’d prefer Babeyoncé) to create a line of fancy baby gear including strollers, diaper bags, and cosmetics—because even babies need makeup nowadays.

Of course, there is the chance that the couple intends to protect the little one’s name. Already, the responsible, tabloid-reading workers at the trademark office have shut down two requests for the names “Blue Ivy Carter NYC” and “Blue Ivy Carter Glory IV”—not to mention the new strain of marijuana or countless martinis named after the not-yet-one-month-old hip-hop princess.

No wonder the newest generation of celebrities is turning into Lindsay Lohan act-a-likes! Maybe the couple has the purest of intentions, but considering that Hova already exploited his kid by including a snippet of her cry in his new track “Glory,” we’re inclined to believe some Swarovski-encrusted Blue Ivy strollers are in our future.

Word: Babeyoncé

Meaning: The primary offspring of Beyoncé Knowles and Jay-Z; synonym: the Saviour.

Usage: “And now for your first Babeyonce update of 2012: There’s still no baby.” —a reporter at Jezebel.com